It's a Bird, It's a Plane....

It's Super Mimi!  AKA Mimi on Crack.  Sometimes she gets a little bee in her bonnet and she runs around like a crazy person dog.  And all you have to say to get her going again is "I'm gonna get you!"  and she's off like a shot!

I can't get the video to load so please see Super Mimi here on You Tube.

P.S. Ignore the blankets everywhere...I've been sick...and lazy.

Ten Essential Holiday Tips!

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit.  In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately.  Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can.  And quickly.  Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare.  In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch.  You can't find it any other time of year but now.  So drink up!  Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip?  It's not  as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something.  It's a treat.  Enjoy it.  Have one for me. Have two.  It's later than you think.  It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it.  That's the whole point of gravy.  Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on.  Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes.  Fill it with gravy.  Eat the volcano.  Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk.  If it's skim, pass.  Why bother?  It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it.  Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's.  You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do.  This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound  plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge.  Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention.  They're like a beautiful pair of shoes.  If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies.  Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat.  Have a slice of each.  Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin.  Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert?  Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake?  Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost.  I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention.  Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.  Remember this motto to live by: 


"Life should NOT be a journey to the  grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, drink in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a  ride!"

Have a great holiday season!

Eat the World?

I took sign language in high school.  I loved it!  It was the one subject that I was actually good at.

For some reason hearing people love to do songs in sign language.  I don't really understand this.  Deaf people can't hear music.  Anyhoo, for my sign language final I translated and signed "Feed the World" by Band Aid.  Man I loved that song!  (It's on my music player if you want to hear a little sample).

I signed the entire song and was pretty proud of myself.  I was confident that I had aced it and had blown everyone out of the water with my mad skills.  Until my friend Cindy let me know that I had signed "Eat the World" instead of "Feed the World" for the entire song.  Woops....Now THAT was embarrassing!

My first blog award!

Well goodness gracious, if I don't feel SPECIAL today!  My bloggy bff Mrs. Foxy at the Foxy den gave me this little doozie today:

I just don't know what to do with myself, other than to accept it and admit that I too heart her blog.  We met through SITS and it was instant friendship.  I mean, she's awesome, I'm awesome, what's not to get?

So thanks Mrs. Foxy for the recognition.  Blogging has been so fun and I am constantly trying to think of witty stuff to put out here in the blogosphere.

I hope you all have a wonderfully wacky Wednesday.  I'm off to meet with the potty doctor (not his official title I'm sure) and see if we can't solve these stomach problems.  Then it's the Low Dough Christmas Show tonight... Phil Vassar, Bucky Covington and some chick named Bombshell.  Can't beat $5 concert tickets with 5 of my favorite ladies!

Ya'll come back now, hear?

Merry SITSmas!

Hello friends.  I belong to an awesome blog group called SITS.  This is my first year participating in SITSmas, the kick off to holiday wishes!

Last night I made my first batch of caramels...an annual Christmas event.  My grandparents started this tradition early in to their 60 year marriage.  Homemade caramels and turtles and peanut clusters...OH MY!  Several years ago my grandpa decided he was too old to do the annual candy making.  I asked him if he would teach me how to make it so that I could carry on the tradition.  He painstakingly showed me how to make the candy, repeating every detail so that I could memorize it.  At the time I was annoyed that  he was SO SLOOOOOOOOOW.  I was even a bit rude, and acted as if I knew better than him and did a lot of mental eye rolling.  And of course my candies NEVER turned out as good as his.

This is the first Christmas since my Grandfather's death this past May.  The first year of me truly carrying on the family tradition without him.  As I was stirring the cream in to the butter and sugar I felt a little teary eyed and wished that I had been more patient with  my Grandpa.  That I had cherished the times that we spend together rather than being impatient and impudent.

My Christmas wish this year is for love and compassion for all.  That we will be reminded of our blessings and cherish our families.  I hope my Grandpa knew how much I loved him even if I didn't show it enough.

Merry Christmas to all...and may you enjoy the peace that the holidays bring!

Little Miss Look at my Butt

My sister and I foster dogs for a no kill agency in Utah called Utah Animal Advocay Foundation.  This weekend we got a new dog named Teva.  She is gorgeous.  We're not sure what she is, but she's around 8 lbs and cuddles up like a little doll.

I had to go to the County Animal Shelter to pick her up. That place is so sad.  So many poor dogs waiting to be adopted, and so many of them run out of time.  Teva's last day was Saturday.  I'm so glad we were able to save her.

One of the downsides to getting a dog from an animal shelter is that they are often very dirty and covered in poo.  Teva was no exception to this rule.  Typically we don't bathe them until day 2 so as to reduce the stress of the first day.  I am no doggy washing pro, so I usually strip down to my unders and put on an apron because I often end up as wet as the dog. Since Teva was new and I wasn't sure how she would handle a bath (turns out not very well!) I asked my sister to help me wash her. I was able to stay mostly dry.

After bathing her I took her downstairs to blow her dry (which she hated) and then got on the computer for the first time all weekend.  As I headed back upstairs, with my sister right behind me, I realized with dismay that I hadn't gotten dressed and was still wearing just an apron and my undies.  How embarrassing!  I felt like that line from Heart and Souls about "Little Miss Look at my Butt".  As I went upstairs I turned off all the lights....or so I thought.  I went to the close the blinds to the sliding glass door and accidentally turned the light on to my back porch....and gave my neighbors a show...of me.. in my underwear and my watermelon apron.  I hope they will recover from the grotesque site quickly.

Feeling over looked?

Tired of being invisible?  Do you sit unnoticed on the sidelines while others are picked?  Try the latest scarf fashion and you too will be the center of attention.