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March 24, 2009

I've been getting a little flack about not blogging lately. The truth is that nothing super exciting has been happening AND I've been involved in a marathon of America's Next Top Model, Season 6. Yes, I realize they are on season 11 now, but I got hooked on Oxygen's reruns.

Anyhoo....since my life is pretty boring lately, I thought I'd talk about a couple of random things from my daily commute:

a) The other day we had a huge snowstorm (What? Snow in March you say? Isn't it Spring?! Ha! Welcome to Utah). I cleaned off my car...all 5 windows, the hood, lights, blinkers, etc, and headed off to work. I didn't clean off the top of my car for 2 reasons. 1. It is too tall for me and hard to do with the ski racks and 2. I am lazy.

So I was almost to work and stopped at a light. All of a sudden the SKY WAS FALLING!!! I was trapped in an Avalanche! Ok, nothing that extreme, but the the 6 inches of snow that was piled on top of my car came barreling down on my windshield at break neck speed. I couldn't see, and the snow was too heavy for my windshield wipers to work. So I had to throw my car in park, hit the hazard lights, wait for all of the cars behind me to drive past me, get out of the car, and brush of my windshield. Did I mention that I had rolled a bit in to the intersection before I got my wits about me? It was an adrenaline rush for sure.

b) That same day I was driving home from work, sitting at yet another stop light. I looked briefly at the car to my left. The guy in the car was eating cookies. Normally I wouldn't consider this strange, because I often eat cookies in my car. I mean, who doesn't! But the dude had a really long beard and was getting cookie crumbs all over it...he kindof looked like a homeless guy in a car. I looked away (because I was staring!), but then looked at him again briefly. At this point he was drinking milk from a gallon jug. What Stacy? You say he was drinking milk, from a gallon jug, while driving in the car? Why yes, reader, that's exactly what I said! It was really weird.

c) There is a store front on my daily drive to work that I find strange. It used to be a purple building and housed The Blue Boutique, which is a naughty lingerie store. That store moved down the street to a larger location, and someone painted the building orange and black. There is a sign above the store which says House of Chuckles. Now, I love to chuckle, and imagine a whole house of chuckles! What do they sell you ask? I have no idea...the store is empty and has been ever since I noticed it. I often wonder what happened to it. Was it ever in business? Did people walk in and immediately start chuckling and they laughed themselves silly so they never bought anything? I have no idea, and will probably ever know. But I do get a chuckle when I drive by it anyway.

March 6, 2009

This morning I woke up at 5:19 a.m. with terrible heartburn, not an uncommon event for me. I went in to the kitchen and rummaged through my sister's purse looking for tums. Unfortunately they weren't in there. As I looked around the kitchen, debating whether or not to go downstairs to Jen's bathroom where I knew there were tums, but then risking waking Jen up, I saw a sleeve with some green chewable medication.

Elation! It was a package of Gas-Ex. Now, I know this sounds old lady-ish, but Gas-Ex is my new best friend. Being cursed with chronic stomach problems, I take it ALL THE TIME! I popped that little green "life saver" from the packet, prepared myself for the bad taste (I would like to speak with whoever makes chewable medication and force them to try all the things that supposedly taste good) and popped it in to my mouth.

The taste was horrible as I had expected. But it was not the correct horrible taste. Instantly my mind screamed NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! and I spit out it out. I realized my what I had done....what I had mistaken for a minty chewable Gas-ex was really a minty chewable dog breath mint. GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Needless to say, my heartburn was not cured. But on the plus side, I no longer had morning breath!!