Last Sunday in primary one of the little 4 year old boys came up to me and held out his shoe. He doesn't talk very well and so I could only assume he wanted me to put it on for him. His teacher then told me that she had been trying and could not get it on.
Well, what this little innocent child with his messy hair and big blue eyes did not know is that he came to the wrong person for this! I am clothing assistant challenged. I can't put on children's shoes to save my life. Can't help them unbutton their pants, can't help them put on tights. I can't even zip my own jackets. Once my friend asked me help her put in her belly button ring and I almost died. First of all...eww, gross!...and 2nd of all, you're asking me, Miss Shaky Fingers, to put a medal object into a tiny little hole.. IN YOUR STOMACH???!!! Let's just say that event, though hysterically funny, was unsuccessful.
So I tried with all my might to put this shoe on the little boy. I pushed. I pulled. I turned his sock around. I held his sock tight. I grunted. I groaned. I cajoled. I begged. All useless. That shoe was NOT going back on his foot.
He was pretty upset at my failure, and REALLY wanted his shoe on, so admitting defeat I left to find his mother. After a few minutes of unsuccessful searching I went back and told him I couldn't find her and that he could just put his shoe under his chair until class was over.
A couple of minutes later, I looked over at him. He was happily chewing on his shoe. All was right in his little world again.
I'm all about helping a friend out, but for reals...I draw the line at helping install navel jewelry. Shudder.
ReplyDeleteSo I guess you'd really be useless with a nipple ring?
ReplyDeleteUh yeah pretty much
ReplyDeleteum, hilarious!! i love your jobs because they give you the funniest stories to share with us! :)
ReplyDeleteWhat's that saying? If the shoe doesn't fit, eat it....
ReplyDelete